Thursday, September 25, 2014

BlackBerry Passport's Keyboard

Dear Apple - THIS is 'innovation'. Samjhe?

Now, if they could have THIS Touch/Gesture-Enabled keyboard on the BlackBerry Classic… hmmm. It would definitely eliminate the need for the Tool Belt row.

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Zabardasti Ki Reporting


  • Reflective of his desire to build smart cities, Modi kicks off his US tour with meetings with current New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio and his predecessor Michael Bloomberg.
  • He also meets Nobel Prize-winning scientist Harold Eliot Varmus, director of the National Cancer Institute showing his concern for health issues.
  • An address to the annual festival of Global Citizen Initiative, a movement for eradication of extreme poverty, at Central Park is demonstrative of Modi's anti-poverty focus.
  • A visit to Ground Zero the site of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attack on World Trade Centre and 9/11 memorial in New York, shows India's concern with and determination to fight terrorism.

The crap they missed out:

  • Modi wearing spectacles shows his absolute support to the association of ophthalmologists.
  • Modi carrying a pen in his chest pocket demonstrates his concern for the literacy program.
  • Modi smiling along with John Kerry is demonstrative of his anti-plaque focus.

Reflective of Obama administration's desire to build bridges with Modi who was shunned by the US for nearly a decade for his alleged failure to control the 2002 Gujarat riots, he will be housed in the 190-year-old historic Blair House, presidential state guest house across the street from the White House.

Failing to mention that the Blair House is not something that has been arranged specifically for Modi, but has been used to accommodate heads of state including (but not limited to) Hosni Mubarak, Benazir Bhutto, Musharaf, Boris Yelstin, Vladimir Putin, Jiang Zemin, Nouri Al Maliki, Sheikh Sabah, Sheikh Jaber, Hamid Karzai (twice at least).

Housing Modi in the Blair House is not reflective or demonstrative of anything. That building was acquired solely for the purpose of housing heads of state.

And the article ends with….

Meanwhile, with Modi expected to be fasting during the US sojourn, what dish would those cooking up his agenda serve at his private dinner with Obama remains a mystery.

Kya reporting hai. Waaah!

Monday, September 22, 2014

When you see what some girls marry, you realize how they must hate to work for a living.

Helen Rowland

TOI's Point Of View

Just for the record, I have not added any emphasis to the screenshot above. That all is the work of TOI.


…At the trailer launch of Chennai Express (a public event in her REAL life), Deepika Padukone was seen sporting an anarkali with a low cut neckline. The video tweeted by @TOIEntertain had been hosted on youtube for over a year and was produced and uploaded by a channel called 'Kraft Buzz' on June 18, 2013.

Deepika, we accept your reel vs real argument, but what about all the times, and there have been many, when you have flaunted your body off screen — while dancing on stage, posing for magazine covers, or doing photo ops at movie promotional functions? What 'role' do you play there? So why the hypocrisy? ….

Yes, the headline could have been better. But the world of online is very different from that of newspapers. It is chaotic and cluttered — and sensational headlines are far from uncommon.

We have always campaigned against the moral police. We believe there's no shame in Deepika showing off her body, but does she now want us to first check with her as to which pictures of her — taken at public events — we can or cannot publish? Are we going to have a parallel censor board for pictures of film stars taken off screen but in plain sight of the world, as Deepika's was?…

Deepika, who began her career as a 'calendar girl' for a liquor brand, has written, ''Yes we marvel, envy and drool over a male actors 8 pack abs in a film, but do we zoom in on the mans 'crotch' when he makes a public appearance and make that 'cheap headlines'??!!'' Deepika, just for the record, we do not zoom into a woman's vagina or show her nipples. As a newspaper, we take every care to ensure that we pixelate them if they show up in a picture, but your cleavage is as sexy as Shah Rukh Khan's '8-pack' abs. Given the nature of the online media worldwide, there could well have been a story headlined, "OMG...Shah Rukh's 8-pack sexy abs!!!" You've also written, ''Everyone is entitled to an opinion. I have little interest to take this further as it might get more attention than it deserves and might be further misconstrued and twisted to sell more undeserved headlines.'' Despite having made your point on Twitter, you have chosen to re-tweet every message and given as many interviews as you could. This has obviously been great publicity for you, timed perfectly with the release of your new film. The video's been on YouTube for a year, why object now?


Firstly, one must appreciate TOI for accepting that the 'headline' could have been better. What I don't understand is, why couldn't they just end it there? That was the initial problem. It was a crappy headline for a news-paper/channel/website. The issue wouldn't have gone this far if TOI hadn't put up that 'Compliment' tweet. That just made a bad situation worse.

As many have pointed out, this isn't the first time it has happened. Just because no one (as in no celeb) had complained (publicly), doesn't mean that none ever would. IF TOI had bothered to read some of the gazillion comments on their shitty articles, they would have noticed at least a few hundred thousand comments stating that they should stop putting up such articles. This all was way before Deepika's tweet or that idiotic headline. TOI (and others) simply ignored those because it wasn't a celeb or a public figure complaining. There simply is no need to respond to the common reader.

TOI's Priya Gupta asks - does she now want us to first check with her as to which pictures of her - taken at public events - we can or cannot publish? 

No. What Deepika (and a lot of other sensible people) would want is for TOI (and similar publications/media outlets) to be a bit sensible when:

  • Coining the headlines.
  • Determining what is news-worthy and what isn't.
  • Going crazy with 'red marks the spot' highlights on pictures and videos.

That would be a good starting point.

Priya Gupta also points out that Deepika's outrage was timed perfectly with the release of her new film. The video's been on YouTube for a year, why object now?. TOI even mentions the date - June 18, 2013.

Priya Gupta… please note that Deepika has had other releases in 2013. So, if she wanted to use this video nonsense for publicity, she would have used it for Ram-Leela (Released in November 2013). The fact that she did not use it then, should be enough validation that Deepika didn't raise the issue to rake up publicity.

As far as the 'Why object now' bit is concerned - You idiot, she did not object to the video. She objected to you using that video with a crappy headline and terming it as NEWS. Do you NOT understand that?! Even now?! Given that you put up that shit article 'now', that is the reason why she is objecting 'now'.

About Priya Gupta's other question Why The Hypocrisy - but what about all the times, and there have been many, when you have flaunted your body off screen — while dancing on stage, posing for magazine covers, or doing photo ops at movie promotional functions? What 'role' do you play there?

Priya - If someone at the dance show were to put a red marker across Deepika's tits and hold up a board saying 'OMG amazing cleavage', I assure you, she would object. No hypocrisy. She would object if any of the magazines she has shot for were to do that and refer to it as 'Entertainment NEWS'. While attending a party / bash / film premiere - if someone would use laser pointers to point at her nipples or her crotch, she would object then as well. Samjhe?

Ek aakhiri baat - Stop pretending that you or TOI are trying to resolve the issue or actually have a point here. You are just trying to get as much footage out of this incident as you can. You want it to be in the news so you can talk about it, have Arnab conduct a 'debate' (where all he does is scream at the camera) on this 'topic' and you get to term this cheap shit as journalism.


Haaaai Zaaalim!

Please note - This is not TOI or any 'news' website. It's my personal blog. 'Haai Zaalim' Can be taken as a compliment if one wants to. I assure you, at this moment - I have no intentions of using it to compliment Deepika's charming personality and her inner beauty or her dancing skills.

I think she looks HOT in the video and that's all there is to it.

If I was seeking 'intellectual stimulation', I wouldn't be looking for it on YouTube. Reading a book would be a better option.

Thursday, September 18, 2014

'Tibet's Problem Is India's Problem,' Says Dalai Lama


The Dalai Lama today said that "Tibet's problem is India's problem" adding that the long-standing issue need to be resolved but not by force. The remarks came amid loud protests by Tibetans outside New Delhi's Hyderabad House where Prime Minister Narendra Modi is holding summit talks with Chinese President Xi Jinping.


Correction - Tibet is China's problem.

India has it's own issues with China. There is absolutely no reason for India to interfere in the Tibet-China row. This is NOT the US. At least one area where Indian government can show better sense than the western governments and not stick their nose in another nation's [internal] dispute.

Adverts In The Header?!

Which idiot at TOI thought this would be a good idea?

Seriously?! What the fuck is wrong with these people! Can't they do ANYTHING right?

Mallika Chased By Paparazzi

Ahem… why would the paparazzi be chasing someone who is always willing to be photographed? In fact, she is the one who always seems to be chasing a camera or a microphone.

Hope PM Narendra Modi Would Convey India's Concerns to Chinese President Xi Jinping: Congress


Ahead of India-China talks in New Delhi tomorrow, the Congress today said it hoped Prime Minister Narendra Modi would "discuss and register" India's concerns over Chinese "incursions" into Indian territory with visiting President Xi Jinping.


Does the Congress believe that the Indian PM will spend the entire time discussing dhoklas?? Obviously in between all the swinging, painting presentations, waving… they will be talking about issues (of both sides).

If the Congress does have doubts and actually does believe that the entire trip will involve chilling, swinging and sight seeing, then the Congress delegation (meeting Xi on 19-09-14) can discuss and convey the concerns themselves. It is after all India's concerns and not BJP / Congress concerns.

Note to Congress - If Rahul baba isn't interested in politics, then why drag him along?

Modi Xi Swinging

Skip to the 40 second time marker.

BJP supporter or not, Modi fan or not - Modi and Xi swinging on the swing was… err… let's just say it wouldn't seem out of place if Karan Johar was doing it.

Another BlackBerry Porsche


The 'Porsche Design' logo in the front, does seem out of place. Other than that, the rest of the phone looks pretty cool (love the keyboard). The glassy back cover looks classy.

At the time of this post, the price tag had not been put up. I am pretty sure once they do put up the price tag, it will be ridiculous (even with a premium BB PIN). But engadget calling this ridiculous anyway… err… guess only Apple products make sense to most (if not all) tech reviewers / gurus. Anything other than Apple is definitely 'ridiculous' (by default) even if they can't come up with any proper reason for terming it 'ridiculous'.

If You Liked The Rehman Malik Video…

Then there is a good chance that you will love this!

Pride - Pretty sure you have watched this, but watching it again would be just as satisfying.

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Rehman Malik Not Allowed To Board

Just wanted to put up this video.

Kasam khuda ki, pehli baar koi video dekh kar itni khushi hui hai!

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

30% Discount Or 25% Discount

  Am I the only one who thinks this is stupid / needlessly confusing / redundant / recruitment failure / supervision failure / bad marketing?

The NoPhone

It's bad enough that some idiot thought there was a need for something like this. It's even worse that he started off a KickStarter page for this. What's really depressing is that we share this world with at least 117 retarded mental cunts!

Can some global authority please propose to make stupidity a punishable (by death) offence? You would be able to tackle the other issues (like Climate Change, Terrorism, Racism etc.) a lot more effectively with stupid people out of the way.

Sunday, September 14, 2014

TOI Fucked Up… Big Time

So, this is how it all started:

Not the first time TOI has come up with an inappropriate / idiotic headline. But, Deepika pointed out that this was in bad taste and had a few things to say about it on Twitter:

It does matter when a celebrity says so. At least one would think that it should matter. Plenty of people re-tweeted Deepika’s tweets. Added their own thoughts / views as well.

That's when TOI fucked up big time. TOI decided to respond to Deepika’s tweet(s):

Now that’s just asking for it!

Perhaps the idiot who came up with the headline / article just MIGHT get to retain his job. But the person managing TOI’s Twitter account is definitely going to have to look through the Wanted section of the classifieds.

Personally, I don't think there's intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one?

Bob Monkhouse


  Waste of time.

Tuesday, September 9, 2014

X-Men - Days Of Future Past

By itself, the film is cool. It's even fun to watch - In spite of the significant lack of eye-candy and an immense amount of stupidity. For example - Wouldn't it be simpler if one would kill Dr. Trask (Peter Dinklage) in 1972 or 1971 or even earlier?

The future X-men are going to be sending Wolverine back in time, anyway. What's a few more years? Why wait for it to be so close to Trask's announcement(s) or scheduled meetings or near completion of his project? Travel back for a few more years and kill him when he is just starting off with the research.

Just one of those things… but the point is, in spite of crap like that, the film was watchable… by itself. The bigger problem is… when viewed in conjunction with the other X-Men films, I am super confused about the X-Men timeline now… It simply doesn't add up (for me).

Another Pathetic Advertisement

Seriously… who the hell is approving these ads?

Monday, September 8, 2014

The Shiva Trilogy - Amish Tripathi

Definitely NOT India's Lord Of The Rings (an exaggeration by the Hindustan Times). The comparison is idiotic.

The Immortals Of Meluha - Readable. Amusing, but far from morally uplifting or enlightening or even enthralling.

The Secret Of The Nagas - Readable. Actually a tad bit better than the first one.

The Oath Of The Vayuputras - Boring. Way too much blabbering in this one.

  • Parvateshwar's dilemma (repeated again and again).
  • Ganesh and Karthik's 'battle plans' and assumptions and bluffs and double bluffs and all that… really annoying.
  • The chit chat sessions with the Vasudevs (and later with the Mithra) gets extremely annoying at times. Way too many questions that have obvious answers. Way too many pointless questions.

Speaking of pointless questions, here is one:

On page 284 - ‘Before you answer, know this, that in the old Parihan language, there was no place for the production and perception of the phonetic sound “s”. It either became “sh” or “h”

So… how come the Vayuputras are able to say words like Daivi AStra, BrahamaStra, PashupatiaStra?? I mean the Mithra himself says these words. He does use the term AHura but he also uses the other words that have a S in them.

Possible explanation could be that the Daivi astras and all the other fancy ones came in AFTER the period of the OLD Parihan language. Convenient as it may be, it just doesn't add up.

  • The story mentions Lord Rudra banned the nuclear weapons (with fancy names) after the war with the Asuras - 1
  • Logical deduction - The Asuras would only be seeking refuge / asylum in Pariha after being defeated by Lord Rudra - 2
  • From 1 and 2, it can be deduced that when Asuras were admitted into Pariha, the fancy-named nuclear weapons were already in existence (they had to be, for Lord Rudra to ban them) - 3
  • It was only after their admittance into Pariha, that they decided to call their gods as AHura(s) - 4
  • From 3 and 4, it is clear that the OLD Parihan language was being used during the period of Daivi astras, Brahamastra and Pashupatiastra.

I was so bored… I didn't even bother to read the last 100 or so pages of the last book.

If knowledge can create problems, it is not through ignorance that we can solve them.

Isaac Asimov

Thursday, September 4, 2014

Some People Have WAY Too Much Time On Their Hands

Seriously… Just kill yourself. Do the world a favour.

Another Research Finding That Just Doesn't Make Sense


In mice, nicotine was found to alter brain biochemistry and prime the animals to develop a need for cocaine.


This was a research done by the crazy Kandels Eric and Denise Kandel.

I don't see Denise Kandel listing ALL THE POSSIBILITIES in her yap session. Why pick the worst of the lot? More importantly, why does the media insist on making it a headline when it is just one of the million possible possibilities??!

Question - How did the mice convey to the researcher that the mice had developed a need for cocaine? I really want to know. Because if we have mice who can talk or write or are telepathic, then we should have heard about THAT finding before this idiotic one. Don't you think? (*Pictures a cute white mouse looking at Denise Kandel as he rolls a torn dollar bill and says 'I need some coke, bitch').

We don't yet know whether e-cigarettes will prove to be a gateway to the use of conventional cigarettes and illicit drugs, but that's certainly a possibility - Almost ANYTHING is possible! The 'finding' that you are harping on is a possibility just like:

  • It is certainly a possibility that e-cigarette users may quit smoking altogether. OR
  • We don't yet know whether e-cigarettes will prove to be a gateway to murder, but there is certainly a possibility that some e-cigarette manufactures and smokers would want to strangle the Kandels.

Just as, it is certainly a possibility that age has caught up with Eric and Denise Kandel turning them into crazy senile idiots who have really burnt their brains out. Well… I can't be completely sure about that, but that's certainly a possibility.

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Biometric ID That Doubles As Cash Card


Abuja, Nigeria 28 August - Nigerian President Goodluck Jonathan today received his National eID card, heralding the official launch of the eID pilot program. In the pilot phase, the Nigerian Identity Management Commission(NIMC) will issue MasterCard-branded identity cards with electronic payments functionality to 13 million Nigerians. This initiative is the largest rollout of a biometric-based verification card with an electronic payment solution in the country and the broadest financial inclusion program in Africa.


Sigh… this could very well have been a headline about India's Aadhaar Card, if only people were sensible about it. It was proposed a number of times that the Aadhar Card be used similarly (perhaps not as seamlessly). Here are a few links:

Problems were… the people trying to get this accomplished in India simply didn't have the ability to convince. The program wasn't publicised enough. General lack of interest. Red-tape. Most of the important information/benefits that should have been highlighted and yelled out constantly on every possible podium were just given a passing mention in some obscure government websites or in some boring lengthy article. The problem was primarily PR and campaigning. THAT and of course 0 support from the opposition (To be expected. It's called the opposition for a reason).

Interestingly enough, the Modi government is just building up on the same thing, on the same mechanism and seems to have the right approach as far as marketing / PR etc. is concerned (I always said, the marketing/PR team for Modi is brilliant). That and a horribly weak opposition should ensure that there will be at least some work on the program. Albeit 2 years late.

Tuesday, September 2, 2014