Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Some More From DamnYouAutoCorrect

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WalkSafe – An App To Help You Cross The Road (??!!)


Researchers at Dartmouth College and the University of Bologna in Italy have developed an Android app that uses the camera on a smart phone to detect oncoming traffic.

The app relies on machine-learning and image-recognition algorithms to identify the fronts and backs of vehicles, and takes into account varying light conditions, phone tilt, and blur. When WalkSafe detects a car approaching at 30 miles per hour or faster, it vibrates the phone and makes a sound to alert the distracted user.



Clearly, the researchers are convinced that Android users are super dumb.

Ok, I'll play along. Here are a few questions:

  • Agreed that the pedestrian is distracted and ignores the oncoming traffic. What about the driver? How come the driver can't see the idiotic pedestrian??
  • What about the cars coming in from the other side? Ever heard of a two-way street or is that an alien concept?
  • Given that the makers believe an app is needed to save us from jumping in front of an oncoming car, my next question is - Does the app start off with a splash screen - insisting that this crap will work only if the phone camera is facing the direction of the oncoming traffic?

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Sharad Pawar Gets A Power Slap

Nice one!

The last time I was this delighted about a headline was when Bhajji slapped Sreesanth.

Stupidity – Apparently There Is No Limit


Jaipur company dupes 1.75 lakh people of over Rs 200 crore

Jaipur: A company called Gold Sukh has allegedly swindled over 1.75 lakh investors of crores of rupees and shut shop all of a sudden. The company that operated out of Jaipur had promised a 150 per cent increase in investments in 18 months.

Though there are no clear estimates, it is believed that over Rs 200 crore has been swindled. The company ran its fraud in 27 cities across the country. The four directors of this company have vanished.


Read the rest of the article and you will be surprised as to just how stupid people can be. I had a very difficult time. I mean.. I know "people" – in general, are a stupid lot, but THIS was too much.


"They used to say give us Rs 23,000 and We (sic) will give you Rs 23 lakh in two years. But when I came here I found nobody and the place was locked," said one angry investor.

Yes. A lot of people say a lot of things. That doesn't mean you have to believe everything, does it??! There is a reason why you have a brain. USE IT you dumb fuck!


"I never went to Gold Sukh. They came to our home and told us to invest. I had invested money for my daughter's wedding and they assured me nothing will happen," said another.

It will be extremely difficult to surpass this gentleman on the stupidity scale. He never even went to their offices! He had money saved for his daughter's wedding and how does he handle those savings? Someone knocks on his door and assures him that nothing will happen to the money, and this guy hands it over!?!?


"There is information that they have left the country, but we will arrest them where ever they are," said BL Soni, Commissioner of Police, Jaipur.

ROTFL. Commissioner uncle – Jaago!

Galaxy Nexus

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Why This Kolaveri (Thuu)

I am NOT going to link the video here (or anywhere).

People have been talking about this song – A LOT – for the past few days. For some reason, it didn't make me curious enough (these days, people will talk about anything) and I just didn't bother looking it up, let alone listen to the song.

Yesterday I got an email from a good friend of mine (Fakhry – you will regret this) with a link to this song and the subject - Hear it. Obviously… I did click on the link and listen to the song.

The logic (for clicking the link)  was – Fakhry knows what type of music I like and what sort of nonsense ticks me off. If he is suggesting that I listen to a particular song, I may not like it as much but it definitely wouldn't be something this horrid. IF it were this horrid, Fakhry (being a good friend) - would never send me the link. At least not without a warning.

This song is shit.

I do not want statistics and number of views / Likes / Shares! Everyone is entitled to their own views / opinion and in my opinion – the general public has shit taste.


Tuesday, November 22, 2011

1 Million Australian Dollars ($ 1 million) ??

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Errr. 1 million Aussie dollars is 986,200 USD.
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Now, why would the newspaper site report it as 1 million Australian dollars ($1 million)???
  • If it's the USD figure, it is wrong.
  • Is it just for the symbol? Do they think the readers can't read the word dollars and need the symbol to identify???

At times, individuals just want to oppose. I don't know why I even bother. Should just leave things the way they are.

Try to explain something for their benefit and it's opposed with great enthusiasm. It's like they have something to prove.

I could understand if this were to happen in a debate or a discussion, but when it happens during the course of a normal conversation - where all one is trying to do is suggest an alternative approach only to simplify the task for the other person – my head just turns blank.

There is not a single logical explanation I can conjure up to explain the behaviour / reaction. Perhaps it is just the way I talk that makes the other person feel the need to oppose me with all his/her might.

Decision – provide suggestions ONLY when asked for.

Anna Suggests To Beat Up People Who Won’t Give Up Drinking

New Delhi:  In an exclusive interview to NDTV, Anna Hazare explains why he thinks those who drink should be beaten and humiliated in public.

Explaining how he got people in his village Ralegaon Siddhi and the surrounding areas to give up drinking, the 74-year-old Gandhian activist said, "...we will give three warnings because after all they are our people. But  after the warnings, we drag that person to the temple and make him promise that he will never drink again in his life.  Even after all this if they continued, we used to tie him in a pole near the temple and beat him."


Hmm. Probably the people in his village drink so they can tolerate him (Anna). Hum to issliye peete hain ke tumhen bardaasht kar saken.

Buddha Anna must’ve been drunk to actually think someone would respond positively to that statement. I don’t get it why he is opposed to drinking. With the type of bullshit and stunts this idiot keeps coming up with, it would be helpful for him if his followers were in an inebriated state.

If anything at all, Anna should be passing out joints to the crowd at his meetings / gatherings / rally. Not only will it be a bigger gathering, it will definitely be a peaceful one. Tolerating Anna’s nonsense would be so much easier. Want to do something for the country eh, Anna? Here is your chance.

I would like it (a lot) if someone would tie up Anna to a pole and beat him. On second thoughts – that would take too long.

Where the hell are those terrorists / assassins when you need one?!! Arrey bhai, koi hai? Iss gaandu Gandhivaadi ko goli kab maaroge?

NDTV TypoPicture 1

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Update On The Comtel Air Issue

Austrian airline Comtel Air cancelled all its flights between Amritsar and Birmingham on Thursday when Skyjet in Essex said it had filed for bankruptcy.

The flight cancellations have left about 180 people stranded in India.

Passengers are being offered special rates on BMI. The UK Civil Aviation Authority has agreed to refund them.


You may want to also read:

Airline Asks Passenger For Money… To Refuel!
Bhupinder Kandra Should Get His Head Examined

Montek Admits Plan Panel Went Wrong On Inflation Projection

PTI | Nov 20, 2011, 11.01AM IST

NEW DELHI: Planning Commission deputy chairman Montek Singh Ahluwalia on Sunday conceded that he went wrong while projecting moderation in inflation which remains near the double-digit mark.

"It is true that we were hoping that this (moderation in inflation) will happen earlier, to that extent our credibility becomes a question," he told in a interview for CNN-IBN's TV programme 'Devil's Advocate' when asked why government's repeated projections on inflation proved false.

"You should recognise that short-term forecast is subject to error," he said. He, however, asserted inflation would moderate to 7-7.5 per cent by March, 2012.


So why bother making a forecast in the first place (given that you know it is subject to error)??

Asserted inflation would moderate to 7-7.5 % by March 2012 - ahem... I have a question - isn't this (too) a short-term forecast?

Lagta hai Sardaar ji ke permanently baarah baj gaye hain.

The Mentalist - Season 4 Episode 8 – Pink Tops


One of the worst Mentalist episodes till date. This is at the top of the list. Right next to Cackle-Bladder Blood (Season 3 Episode 2).

Hate it when this happens to good shows.

Qareeb Maut Khadi Hai Zaraa Thahar Jaao

Saifuddin Saif…

Qareeb maut khadi hai zaraa thahar jaao
Qazaa se aankh ladi hai zaraa thahar jaao

Thaki thaki si fazaayen bujhe bujhe taare
Badi udaas ghadi hai zaraa thahar jaao

Nahin ummeed ki hum aaj ki sahar dekhen
Ye raat hum pe kadi hai zaraa thahar jaao

Abhi na jaao ki taaron kaa dil dhadakta hai
Tamaam raat padi hai zaraa thahar jaao

Phir iss ke baad kabhi hum na tum ko rokenge
Labon pe saans adi hai zaraa thahar jaao

Dam-e-firaaq mein jee bhar ke tum ko dekh to loon
Ye faisale ki ghadi hai zaraa thahar jaao

Republican Choice




Saturday, November 19, 2011

Crashed Ferrari Coffee Table

Charly-Molinelli-Crashed-Ferrari-Table-F  “

Cut a hole in a box. Put your crashed Ferrari in that box. Make her put that box... in the living room. And that's the way you do it. Unbelievably, that's really how you create a Crashed Ferrari Coffee Table.


I am thinking about adding another label / category to tag some of my blog posts - Stupid Rich People

Pakistan Telecom Watchdog Drafts Rude Text Message Ban

Guardians of linguistic purity have long warned against the pernicious impact that text messaging may have on the young, but Pakistan officials have taken such concerns to a new extreme by demanding that mobile phone operators block all text messages using offensive words.

With a creativity and dedication to the task unusual for local officialdom, the country's telecoms regulator has issued a list of more than 1000 words and phrases which will be banned.

After serious deliberation and consultation, officials from the Pakistan Telecommunication Authority (PTA) have come up with more than 50 phrases using the word "fuck" and 17 involving "butt".


Do read the entire article. It’s got a lot of WTF moments. For example: In the letter to mobile phone firms, watchdog director Muhammad Talib Doger said "the system should be implemented within seven days ... and a report submitted to PTA on monthly basis on the number of blocked SMSs"

Ahem… guess it’s ok when a cricketer uses abusive language on the field – repeatedly. Even more acceptable when the entire team does it! That aside, this country does plenty of serious issues that merit attention. I fail to see how this (rude text message) qualifies for this degree of attention. 

Concerned about offensive language in text messages. Err… Seriously! Don’t these authorities have more important things to worry about?

Friday, November 18, 2011

Love is NOT blind. It’s retarded.

Can’t remember where I heard that, but it does make sense.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Bhupinder Kandra Should Get His Head Examined

I had posted earlier about a Comtel Air flight refusing to take off until the passengers paid additional money.

For that incident, (as reported by the BBC) - Bhupinder Kandra stated that the passengers will receive a refund of the additional amount paid.

Bhunpinder (sic) Kandra, director of passenger services for Comtel Air, said: "I have heard what happened, it shouldn't have happened, and I will investigate why it happened.

"The people who had to pay the money will receive a refund."

Now he barks again has issued another statement:

Bhupinder Kandra, the majority shareholder in the airline involved Comtel air, told Today presenter Justin Webb that he would not be paying the passengers back, as they were owed the money by travel agents who booked the flight and not by the airline.


It’s bad enough that Comtel Air is NOT going to refund the amount to those passengers. What makes it even worse is - there is yet another flight being delayed and Bhupinder says the flight will NOT take off unless the passengers pay up another EUR 125 each!

His point is – the travel agent has not paid HIM. Either the Indian government pays or the passengers pay or the British government pays or someone pays the money into his office or else the flight will not take off.

Aakhir apni zaat dikha hi di. Chotte log humeshaa chotte hi rahenge. Doesn’t matter if they become the director of passenger services or majority shareholders.

Agar business nahin sambhaal sakte to shuru kyon karte ho?

I seriously hope someone sues this guy for every last penny he has.

Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes


Nothing special. Watchable but… it just didn’t generate enough interest for me to actually give a damn about what was happening to the characters in the story.

Airline Asks Passenger For Money… To Refuel!

Reena Rindi, who was on the plane with her two-year-old daughter, told Channel 4 News: "We wanted to go home. We'd been stranded for about three to four days. Who was going to take us home?"

She said passengers agreed to pay in order to fly to Birmingham.

"If we didn't have the money they were making us go one by one outside in Vienna to get the cash out," she added.

Another woman who flew from Amritsar to Birmingham via Vienna told the BBC: "We had to pay 150 euros last night in Vienna to get back to Birmingham and then they wouldn't fly us back to Birmingham so we had to pay ourselves to come back."


Comtel Air introduced cheap flights from Birmingham to Amritsar in the Punjab, via Vienna, last month.

Paying for the in-flight meal is probably acceptable, but some airlines take it a bit too far. I thought Ryanair was taking it too far when Ryanair boss suggested a Pay-Per-Pee structure [Link].

But asking passengers to pay for refuelling!? I have loads of reasons for not flying budget airlines, but I never thought something like this would be included in that list.

Interestingly enough, here is the message from their website:

Gain an insight in the world of luxury flying – with COMTEL AIR.

Enjoy our unique service during your flight with exclusive business comfort offered by our crew of highly qualified and experienced employees teamed with their world renowned and valued Austrian charm.

Experience warmth, sincerity, professionalism, safety, competence and premium service. All wrapped up in one airline:COMTEL AIR.



Talk About Being Specific !

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Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Christians Irked By Film

NEW DELHI: A B-grade horror film 'Kaun Hai Waha?' has raised the hackles of the Christian community for its anti-Catholic symbols, with members demanding that the adult certificate given to the film be revoked. The film has been in trouble earlier over its graphic posters that displayed Jesus Christ being stabbed and another that had a cross shown upside down.

According to Christian organization Catholic Secular Forum (CSF), which had protested against the anti-Catholic symbols in blockbuster films like Da Vinci Code and Angels and Demons, the film is misrepresenting the Catholic faith. "We will approach the I&B ministry for a revocation of the certificate. They should not be allowed to screen this film," Joseph Dias, secretary general of CSF, said, adding that this was a marketing gimmick for the moviemakers but had played havoc on the sentiments of the community.


Kaun Hai Waha – This is the first time I am hearing about this film. Mr. Joseph Dias states that this is a marketing gimmick for the moviemakers – probably.

I wonder if Mr. Joseph realises that his idiotic protest is proving to be much more effective (than the posters) in marketing the film.

I am picturing Mr. Dias watching The Exorcist or The Omen. If a poster depicting an inverted cross has outraged him so much – it’s not so hard to imagine his head blowing off when he watches any of those 1970’s films. Hmm, I really think somebody should screen those films for him. Can’t wait to read the next day’s headlines.

If it’s hurting your religious sentiments – don’t watch the film. How hard is that? Furthermore, if a film poster hurts your religious sentiments, probably it’s time to take a closer look at your belief structure. Clearly there is something lacking over there.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

BlackBerry 9790


  • 2.44-inch touchscreen display with 360 x 480 resolution.
  • 1GHz CPU.
  • OS7.
  • NFC.
  • 5 MP Auto Focus Camera.
  • 8GB onboard memory.
  • MicroSD slot that offers up to 32GB of additional space.


Space Rings

space_gold_rings_l3vue space_wedding_rings_alqlt


  • 2 categories – Space Rings and Space Wedding Rings.
  • Limited units available – 50 Pairs of each category.
  • Price - USD 12,000 a pair (The first image) and USD 17,000 a pair (Second image)

What’s special about these rings?

These have been made from a special lot of gold that was sent to space in a unique packaging and stayed in space for 15 minutes. This lot was then turned into these rings (rolls eyes).

Along with the ring, the buyers will also receive a USB pen drive containing the documented details of the space flight that carried the gold.


Dikhaawon pe mat jaao, apni akal ladaao.

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Thank You, Surya

Thanks Surya

For the new header image. Much appreciated.



Have seen a few films with a similar storyline.

This one was watchable, but I can easily recall several other films with a similar plot that were a hell lot better than this one.



Boring – even when watching in fast forward mode.

Genelia D’Souza – Thuu. Never did like her.

Balancing 3,118 Coins On A Dime


Watch it if you want to waste 4 minutes 36 seconds of your life.

People have way too much time on their hands.

Puchhate Ho To Suno Kaise Basar Hoti Hai

Meena Kumari Naaz…

Puchhate ho to suno kaise basar hoti hai
Raat khairaat ki, sadqe ki sahar hoti hai

Saans bharne ko to jeenaa nahin kahte yaa rab
Dil hi dukhta hai na ab aasteen tar hoti hai

Jaise jaagi hui aankhon mein chubhen kaanch ke khvaab
Raat is tarah deewaanon ki basar hoti hai

Gham hi dushman hai mera gham hi ko dil dhundhta hai
Ek lamhe ki judaai bhi agar hoti hai

Ek markaz ki talaash ek bhatakti khushbu
Kabhi manzil kabhi tamhid-e-safar hoti hai

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Apple's iPhone 4S Battery Troubles Now Joined By New Problems

Apple says it's still investigating battery drain issues with the iPhone 4S after some users complained that the iOS 5.0.1 update didn't solve their problems. But now Apple is facing new gripes that the iOS 5.0.1 update is causing more problems with the iPhone 4S including; microphone failures, Wi-Fi signal loss, and cellular network reception issues, according to reports.


Judge Orders Divorcing Couple To Swap Facebook And Dating Site Passwords

At the end of September, Judge Kenneth Shluger ordered that the attorneys for Stephen and Courtney Gallion exchange “their client’s Facebook and dating website passwords.”


I didn’t bother to read the complete article.

Regardless of the reasons that led (yes, that IS the past tense for ‘lead’) Judge Kenneth to sign off on this decision, I believe this is down right ridiculous.

How stupid does the world have to get before it comes to an end?! It’s way overdue.

Taj Mahal To Turn Blue On November 13th

The ASI has cleared a proposal to illuminate the Taj Mahal in blue on November 13, the eve of the World Diabetes Day. While a red ribbon is symbolic of HIV, a blue circle is the universal symbol of diabetes.
The ASI has also allowed two other world heritage sites - Agra Fort and Fatehpur Sikri - to be draped in blue. Indudhar Dwivedi, superintendent archeologist (sic) of ASI, Agra, said, "This is the first time the ASI has shown such a gesture to light up these three world heritage sites. We wanted to support the drive to raise awareness against diabetes that affects so many of us."
Dr. Anoop Misra: "Taj Mahal draped in blue will spread awareness about diabetes. The world's most recognized monument to be lit in blue will send a global message. It will help multiply preventive efforts several times."
There is no shortage of idiots in the world. Padhe likhe jaahil.

Instead of spending time and effort on such idiotic gimmicks, wouldn’t it make more sense to set up camps or something where people could be tested and given information, suggestions on medicines and / or food charts? How about THAT for awareness?

Before I read this news article, I wasn’t aware that a blue circle was the universal symbol of diabetes (there are a lot of things I don’t know about). I am pretty sure there will be shit loads of people in Agra who will look at the blue Taj and think “hmm, another light show”.

That can NOT be termed as increasing awareness!

Dikhaawon pe mat jaao… apni akal ladaao.

Just for the record – it’s spelt Archaeological and NOT Archeological !!! Doob maro!

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Friday, November 11, 2011


Rituparno Ghosh's NOUKADUBI Titled as KASHMAKASH in Hindi1

Have read the book a couple of times. Watched different versions of the film as well (Hindi and Bengali). This one, in my opinion – is one of the best renditions by far.

Riya Sen – amazing.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Raat Mujhe

Sandeep Nath…

Raat mujhe ye keh ke chidaaye
Taaron si bhari main - tu hai akeli haaye
Taanon se main jali-jali jaaon
Aaj ruko to bali jaaon

Kya kahoon – bolo na
Kya sunoon - bolo na
Raaton ki harkaton ko tum bhi samjho na
Baaton ki harkaton ko tum bhi samjho na

Shaitaaniyaan ye roz dikhaaye
Aisa kuch karo ke raat lajaaye

Kya kahoon – bolo na
Kya sunoon - bolo na
Iss dil ki karvaton ko tum bhi samjho na
Saanson ki hasraton ko tum bhi samjho na

Betaabiyaan raat jagaaye
Aisa kuch karo ke hosh udd jaaye

Raat mujhe ye keh ke chidaaye
Taaron si bhari mein tu hai akeli haaye
Keh do isse ye na itraaye
Kal jo aaye to sar ko jhukaaye

Saturday, November 5, 2011



Just booked the tickets for this crap. Have to take mom and sister for this nonsense tomorrow (Sister is a huge fan). Sigh… Hota hai, chalta hai… Duniya hai.


Watched it. As expected – total trash. Yet another ‘new low’ for Hindi cinema.

Saheb Biwi Aur Gangster


Jai jai, Sahib.

I was pretty sure Jimmy Shergill would disappoint, but he put in a much better performance than expected. Mahi Gill and Deepal Shaw were amazing.

I liked it. Will be watching this one again. 

How can anyone be so unreasonable? Seriously!

No matter how much you do – it’s never enough. They don’t remember what all you have done. All they can recall is what you haven’t done!

Itne hisson mein batt gayaa hoon main
mere hisse mein kuchch bacha hi nahin

Thursday, November 3, 2011

Apple Confirms iOS 5 Bugs Causing Battery Issues for Some iPhones

Apple on Wednesday said it had found a few problems that are leading some iPhone customers to experience less-than-expected battery life with iPhones running its latest software.

“A small number of customers have reported lower than expected battery life on iOS 5 devices,” Apple said in a statement toAllThingsD. “We have found a few bugs that are affecting battery life and we will release a software update to address those in a few weeks.”